Mobile phones have gradually become the third party that affects the relationship between husband and wife. There was a joke on the Internet: "The furthest distance in the world is when we sit together and you are playing with your mobile phone." This joke reflects the general situation of contemporary marriages - mobile phones have become a "third party" that affects the feelings of many couples ", and the trend continues to grow. The main reasons are as follows:
1. Why does this happen? All of this stems from the rapid development of technology.
Mobile phones are no longer a cold communication tool. Chatting, watching news, playing games, watching short videos, watching movies, shopping and other functions are very complete, making people more and more "unable to put it down". The main reasons why people are addicted to the world of mobile phones are as follows. Men Dislike Interaction Men's mobile phone addiction is higher than women's. This is usually because men prefer to work with objects, such as toys for boys, while women prefer to interact with people.
2. Feelings enter a period of fatigue.
Couples have been together for a long time and understand each other's strengths and weaknesses. Coupled with the trivial things in life, they are prone to "fatigue", such as aesthetic fatigue and interaction fatigue. If there is a child, the married life will gradually shift from the two-person world to the child, and it will be easier to enter the "tired period", and one or both parties may "empathize" with the mobile phone and seek solace. Unable to solve existing problems If there is a disagreement or conflict between husband and wife, some people will escape by "playing with mobile phones" due to introversion or lack of emotional intelligence, unable to deal with complex emotional problems. Mobile phones can allow them to "know everything in the world", gain a "sense of control", and relieve their inner powerlessness. Experiencing parental emotional failures If you have witnessed parental emotional failures, your child may repress or deny his emotional needs as an adult and lack motivation to develop an intimate relationship. In the face of the relationship between husband and wife, they are prone to frustration. This pushes it into the arms of the phone, because the phone doesn't ask for anything other than charging.
3. In the eyes of many people, playing with mobile phones is harmless, but it is not.
According to a survey by Life Times, 45% of people believe that mobile phones have a certain impact on their love life, and another 30% believe that it has a great impact. In marriage, when the attention is attracted by the "mobile phone partner", even before meals and bedtime, the effective communication time between the two is greatly reduced, and the intimacy becomes blank. Over time, irreparable emotional cracks may occur. A survey of 2,000 people found that 50% of people spend at least 1.5 hours playing with their mobile phones after going to bed every night. Sexual time is delayed, communication between the two sides is also reduced, and relationships are destroyed; In marriage counseling cases, 40% of emotional problems are caused by playing with mobile phones. In addition, parents are distracted by mobile phones, often slow to respond to their children's needs or simply ignore them, making children think that communication is meaningless, gradually become indifferent, and even refuse to communicate with parents.
4. Whether for the sake of marriage happiness or the growth of children, once it is found that the mobile phone has become a "third party", the following actions must be taken as soon as possible.
If you want to bring your partner back to reality when you are addicted "for the first time", you need to recall "when did he/she become addicted to mobile phones". Generally speaking, before the partner is addicted to the mobile phone, the two sides may have a huge problem and can only comfort themselves through the mobile phone. It is recommended that the two talk openly and honestly to understand each other's thoughts and identify the problem. Seeking professional help Many people realize that the relationship between husband and wife is indifferent, but they would rather be "single in marriage" than take the initiative to solve it. When you can't solve the "third party" problem of the mobile phone by yourself, you might as well ask a psychologist to analyze the problem with your partner, otherwise it will hurt both parties.
Living together mindfully, couples should leave behind distracting thoughts, savor life, and live in the moment when they get along. It is recommended to practice mindfulness together, such as meeting for tea every weekend, or arranging flowers, learning tea art, practicing yoga, listening to music, etc., to live a simple life in a poetic way, and treat each day as a new day, not a repetition of yesterday.. Mindfulness can help develop the right brain, improve emotional intelligence, preserve the freshness of marriage, and avoid emotional fatigue. Parenting also requires mindfulness Even with children, couples must have enough privacy. It is best for children not to sleep between two people. Before the age of 3, a crib can be placed beside the bed. The elders can help take care of them for 2 to 3 months every year to relieve the pressure of young couples; after the age of 3, children begin to have self-consciousness, You can move to your own room.
The mobile phone will become the third party that affects the relationship between husband and wife, because everyone likes playing with mobile phones very much now, and the husband and wife cannot communicate effectively.
We can do a lot of things by using mobile phones, which brings more convenience to our life. But at the same time, a lot of personal information is also recorded in the mobile phone. Once this information is seen by others, it may affect oneself. Therefore, we do not want our mobile phones to be viewed by others on a daily basis. However, different people will have different opinions on whether their partner should let the other party look at their mobile phone.
1. Some people think that partners should be frank and that there is no problem with looking at their partner's mobile phone.
For some people, they believe that there should be openness between partners. Therefore, these people believe that there is no problem with partners looking at each other's mobile phones. Not only can they watch, but it can also enhance mutual trust and affection. These people believe that the use of cellphones between partners is not only appropriate, but beneficial.
2. Some people think that there should be personal space between partners, and you can't look at your partner's mobile phone.
For others, the relationship between partners is close, but they also need to have their own space. Therefore, these people believe that partners should not look at each other's phones, which is a necessary measure to protect their respective spaces, and should do so.
3. The interaction between partners is more frequent and deeper than others.
Your partner is the person closest to you. The relationship status between partners is much closer and more intimate than the relationship between yourself and other people. Therefore, it is normal for things like looking at each other's mobile phones to happen between partners.
4. Candor between partners is not completely transparent and is conditional.
However, the relationship between partners, while intimate, cannot be unconditionally open and transparent. In fact, even the most intimate partners have their own independent space for each other. This kind of relationship is the most stable state.. Therefore, there is no problem between partners looking at information on each other's mobile phones that does not involve personal secrets. For those information that involves personal secrets, they will pay attention to avoid them, so as to maintain a normal relationship between each other, and two people can maintain a close and harmonious relationship and live a happy life.
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